I am sooo mad!

[windstar]

My daughter had a game last night. The sponsor did not order a bus to take everyone to the game altho we paid for buses as part of the $1,000 we paid out to be on the squad. When the game was done whoever was riding with her she loaded them up and in the meantime my daughter had called for me to pick her up and I immediately left...I am about 10 - 12 min if that far from the city stadium cause it's a straight shot down the freeway. Well when I got there the sponsor and everyone was gone and my 17 yo daughter was left alone with about 4 or 5 guys and a lady and she didn't know any of them. The sponsor wanted to get back to the school before the band buses so she wouldn't have to wait to get off the campus. I am so mad she thought so little of the safety of my child and it was 10 at night.

[annmarie]

Oh Windstar, thats awful. Firstly you would be mad enough with no bus after forking out for the advantage of it. Then for them jus to abandon her on her own. I know Im not a very upfront person when it would come to speaking out for myself, but this kind of thing would make my blood boil.
We have a Code of Ethics with our Association. Anyone over teams or involved with teams must do this course. One of the codes is that all minors should be supervised until their parent/guardian picks them up......even if it means waiting 3/4 of an hour to pick up their daughters

[sdevries]

OMG! that's awefull!!! think i would be mad as h***!!! unbelievable

[motoandnutty]

It sounds to me that a STRONG letter is called for windstar. The 'person in charge' was definitely NOT in charge of the situation!
You need assurances that this will NEVER happen again - and a VERY big apology for last night.
This person needs a wake-up call about what can happen to miners that are left stranded - she should not have assumed that nothing would delay you in getting to the pick-up - especially when it had not been arranged before hand.
You have every right to be mad.

[wienerin]

I feel completely out of place ... actually I cannot understand this uproar. But that's because here it is absolutely no problem (and quite usual) for 16 year old girls to be out at night alone.

[watermelon]

Yikes, this scares me to death! What in the heck was that sponsor thinking? Of herself it seems! I'm so thankful your daughter is safe. Lord have mercy, all kinds of horrible things could have happened.. no matter what time of day/night, with five guys.
It's hard to say what I would do in a case like this, unless I was put in that position. But right now, I would be at the school or the sponsors house saying my peace!
Hugs to you and so thankful she's okay.

[minnieb]

maybe it was a good thing that there were boys there or some weirdo might have grabed her . but i would be doing something about it .I found that kids are better to be in groups even if they don't know each other .
I think I would lose it , if someone did that to my daughter
some people just don't get how easy it is for something to happen , we always had a house full of kids and all of them knew they could ring us for help .we taught the kids that they never leave the group of friends
how many girls have to get hurt before these idoits learn

[windstar]

Update...I have spoken with the assistant principal at the school who by the way was the sponsor for my #2 daughter's flag team...and she was appalled at what happened. She immediately went to the teacher/sponsor and the soponsor called me apologizing like crazy saying she was sorry and it never should have happened and it will never happen again. The assistant principal has also called me back because she has also had words with the sponsor and wanted to know if I felt satisfied or did it need to be pursued further. I told her I am satisfied for now and she said if anything else comes up to please let her know and she will take care of it. I am still mad that it happened in the first place but willing to see if she has learned. I explained to her that I ALWAYS know where my children are and have never had an ounce of trouble from my children and are very protective of them and their safety. Young girls come up missing and without a trace and I don't put mine in that situation. I am hoping this is a wake up call for her.

[annmarie]

Glad you got an apology out of them Windstar

Wienerin, it is the same way here with girls younger out alone at night, but if they are supposed to be supervised or with a sponsor/mentor of a team, its the sponsors duty to take responsibility for them

[wienerin]

ok, annmarie, I think I got it now. "sponsor" has a different meaning in German, so I was on the wrong track.
right, teachers (or who ever) who are in charge have to take their duties serious

[jstitch]

Windstar, I am so glad you called the school. Exactly what I was thinking when I read your original post. I would have been extremely upset if this had happened to one of my daughters as well. (one of mine was a cheerleader also ). I was like you, I ALWAYS knew where my kids were and who they were with. (Although, now I realize that they instigated a few things behind my back a couple of times, usually just a trip to 7-11 or something). If this sponsor has had to be spoken to previously, maybe they need a new sponsor?

[motoandnutty]

I feel completely out of place ... actually I cannot understand this uproar. But that's because here it is absolutely no problem (and quite usual) for 16 year old girls to be out at night alone.

The wrong as I see it is that Windstar's daughter was out as a member of a team, with someone who had the responsibility to organize and watch over the members of that team - which should have included safe transport. When that failed to materialize, they should, at the very least have stayed with each team member until they were collected by a family member.
If a sixteen year old is out socially late at night, that is the responsibility of her own parents, and they are able to exercise their own judgment - this person was in 'loco parentis', and had the responsibility of safeguarding the minors in her charge, and certainly should not have left until that had been fulfilled.

[la_cole]

WoW! I admire your patience, Windstar. I would not have been able to hold back my anger and would not have been able to wait until morning to contact school officials if my child had been left somewhere unescorted. Someone besides me would not have been sleeping that night!

[windstar]

It wasn't easy to sleep last night. I got in the bed and couldn't go to sleep an when I did I was back up at 5am and couldn't wait to call the school. Of course they exploded when I told what had happened. She says she was trying to save money by not getting a bus, but we have paid for a bus. She doesn't have kids but she is still old enough to be responsible and besides she gets extra pay for being the sponsor. Thank you ladies for being supportive. Before I posted here I felt like my blood pressure was sky high all night long and I needed to vent. I also want to make sure she doesn't treat my daughter any differently because I went to someone else before talking to her.

[sdevries]

glad you calme doen a bit about this. think i would move heaven and earth to contact the responsible person that same night it happend. glad everything turned out ok for now.

[Angicrafter]

Oh my gosh Molly.. I dont blame you...That is rediculous ! I hope you give someone heck ! We had something similar happen when our kids were in school they left my 14 year old DD at the school after they got home from an away game. The band director just shrugged when called him out on it. I thought my DH was going to punch him. I ended up reporting the band director to the school superintendant ...not that they did anything but it made me feel a little better. I hope you get this resolved that is such a scary thing.

[dollyj]

I am really glad that you reported it and made the sponser aware of what she did and what could have happened because of her thoughtlessness! I think I would still be a little leary even if she is more cautious now. Joyce

[sharong]

Molly, I cannot believe what happened to your daughter. This is such a scary world. I am very glad the school took your complaints with the the appropriate level of concern but frankly I'd like to see that advisor suspended for a time. I can almosty guarantee nothing will happen with your daughter because schools tend to listen when thins like this take place but each of us has daughters or granddaughters and it is a worry. HUGZ to you and thanks be to God for your DD safety!

[debbsie]

Personally, I don't think an apology is enough. That sponsor should be relieved of her sponsorship duties for the rest of the school year. I believe that the following year she could begin as an assistant sponsor under the watchful eye of the vice-principal until she proved herself. I realize it sounds harsh but I am appalled that the sponsor was immature enough to abandon all thoughts regarding the safety of each team member. An apology is a paltry punishment for such an irresponsible act.

[Grandma Ria]

Windstar OMG! that's awefull!!! I too would be so Mad,you can not leave anybody alone at nigth like that.
Glad you got an apology but it should not have happened,glad all is good.
Enjoy Ria